Unlike some vocation stories, my story does not contain a great conversion. I am much more like the older son, than the prodigal son. Unlike some, I grew up Catholic and have always been active in my faith.

I have known the Benedictines all of my life. My aunt, Sr. Maria, is a Benedictine sister of Mount St. Scholastica in Atchison. For many years, we had the Heppler family Christmas party at her convent. However, I did not really come to know any monks until college.

I was a sickly child, and by reflecting upon this, I realized early in life that God had a special plan for me, as He does for all of us. I was also the kid who loved serving Mass, and was always willing to cover for other servers at the Saturday 6:30 am Mass or to serve at weddings or funerals.

Even in high school, I was very active in my faith, both on the parish and the diocesan levels. I was on a peer retreat team, active in the TEC program, on parish and regional youth boards. But my life was not just youth ministry programs. I was also very active in 4-H. At school, I was involved in several clubs, ran cross-country and shot photos for the journalism publications. My classmates selected me to be most likely to become a priest; and yes, my senior year homecoming date – now a Carmelite – was selected most likely to be a nun.

Ironically, I decided to attend Benedictine because I received the best financial package from them. The first semester at Benedictine, all new students had to take a BC Experience class. In this class we had field trips to pray with the monks and the sisters and we had to write a paper on the Rule of Benedict. I came to a deep appreciation of the Rule for its practicality and its focus on both prayer and work. Even though I seriously considered leaving BC to become a seminarian for the Diocese of Wichita half way through college, I felt God was calling me to continue my studies at Benedictine. Each year my appreciation of the beauty of the Rule continued to grow, as I really began to appreciate its balance and simple, yet profound spirituality. Through working summers for Totus Tuus, I came to love teaching and spreading the faith. During my senior year, Br. John began a college oblates group. (Oblates are people ­– married, single, diocesan priests – who choose to live the Rule of Benedict according to their particular state in life.) Through becoming an oblate, I came to even a deeper love of Benedictinism. Still, I had no clue if God was calling me to marriage, priesthood, or religious life even for a couple of years after graduation.

After graduation, I worked as a D.R.E. for St. Paul's Parish in Olathe. One evening, a man on his way to a Knights of Columbus meeting, walked into my office, removed his hat, and said: "I think you would be a good priest." This simple comment forced me to once again think about the Vocation question. However, the call did not come until the following year.

I took a job as a theology teacher at Bishop Carroll Catholic High School in Wichita. By Spring Break, this first year teacher just needed to get away from everything. So, I called Fr. Meinrad and asked to come up to the Abbey for a retreat. My goal for that week was to recharge my energy level and enjoy time away from creating lesson plans, grading, and the school. It was not to come on a vocation visit. During this week, I rediscovered how much I enjoyed praying the Liturgy of the Hours in choir. In my prayer and reading of the Bible and other books, in the readings at Mass, and even in discussions with various monks, God spoke to me saying: "Come and see." I spent much of that week arguing with God; for, 1) I did not come for a vocation visit, and 2) I knew I was not a good teacher yet, but that I probably would be in a couple of years, and if God wanted to call me to the priesthood or religious life, then it would make sense. Telling God what His plan for me should be did not work. By the end of the week, I had an application to join the monastery.

After much more prayer and consulting with trusted priests and friends, I finally made the decision to "come and see." I would love to tell you that every moment since I joined has been everything I hoped for, but that would be a lie. There were days I was very close to packing my bags and leaving. But through prayer and discussions with spiritual directors, I realized that leaving was not part of God's plan for me. Instead, at nearly the last possible moment before I had to submit a letter asking to be accepted as a novice, and again before first vows and solemn vows, God gently called me to continue to "come and see."

Now, I am in seminary at St. Vincent in Pennsylvania. God willing, I will be ordained a deacon in 2009 and a priest in 2010. I still love praying in common, community life, the spirituality, practicality and moderation of Benedictine life, and the educational and pastoral apostolate of this Abbey. I pray that God will always give me eagerness in truly seeking Him and doing His work.